I know I can ask for a second chance, and a third and a fourth and God would always grant it to me. Not because I’m special or anything, but because He believes there’s a better me hidden somewhere inside this beautiful body I’d want to consider a shadow for now.
To speak the truth, I wish I could turn back the hands of time and mend the broken hearts I’ve tampered with, or zip up talking lips that easily gave me away. All by God’s grace I’m living today, unsure of whatever lies ahead of me. I want to quit. Really I do, but then I think of something I hold so close and so dear that needs to be taken care of without a blink.
God knows I truly need this last chance. I don’t know if I should swear not to repeat anything I did in the past, but I know that if I do and fail to stick to it, it’ll all come back to me. I’m holding on to hope I don’t know if it’s worth it. But to tell you the truth, my life is hanging in a balance right now, and I wish someone would just push me on one side. What’s with the equilibrium anyway?
I want things to go back to the way they used to be back in the days when I knew very little about life. Surely, it’s hard learning from all the mistakes, staying strong because of the hardships and focusing ahead because you know that what’s is done, already signed sealed and delivered.
Things aren’t really as they seem to be. Even the most precious jewel wouldn’t turn out to reap the results you wanted. Perhaps because when you had it, you didn’t take care of it. They all say, don’t lose a diamond while searching for a stone. Yes, it’s true, but to what extent? I don’t know what lies ahead; I’m just hoping it’s something I’m prepared of. And if I won’t like it, all I can ask is strength from the one above. I know He hears me when I call, talks to me when I’m down and gives me a shoulder to cry on too. I’ve never taken seriously whatever God has done to me. I want to – I do. I just don’t know how to.
My heart’s bleeding and I’m crying deep inside. No one can see it but me. My tears are quite invisible, trickling down in the midst of all the smiles and cheers I share with folks. Deep down, I want to tell them to listen to me for just a second. No no no, a nano-second. I’d want them to give me time to cry out all the bottled up emotions I have. Anyway, how would they know?
God just give me a chance; a last chance in life to make things right. To choose the right path because now I know everything isn’t always as it seems. Even if I want more, I won’t make any wrong move just to get it.